If you notice bruises or scratches on your spouse, you should definitely ask. If they act strangely or extremely defensive when you ask, it may be a sign that there is something else going on. Those bruises could be from wild sex or worse, a fight with the person that they are cheating on. Keep an eye out for such types of changes to appearance.

This can also be considered picking fights. Does your spouse take the smallest thing and blow it out of proportion. Are they so overwhelmed by discontent that they have to, “just get out of here” all the time? This is a common tactic of cheaters.

If you confront your partner about suspicious behavior and they don’t take you seriously you should be very concerned. It’s common for a cheater to make you question your own intuition. Chances are if you are feeling suspicious, it’s not without reason. Don’t allow them to make you feel guilty for raising concerns. Don’t let them use reverse psychology to accuse you of adultery. Be aware of attempts to threaten to leave you if you question them. A faithful spouse will be hurt that you think they are cheating but will also be willing to address what behaviors they have that may lead to your insecurities. If you find that your spouse would rather discredit your concerns than address them, it’s a very strong sign that they are cheating on you.

If your spouse is extremely defensive (even when not being accused) they may be cheating on you. There is an extreme amount of guilt that can erupt from cheating. This can expand to paranoia, fearing that at any moment you can discover their infidelity.  This will lead them to defend their every action to try and steer you away from thinking that they might be cheating.

Your spouse may want to avoid any reason for you to think there is anything wrong with the relationship. It’s very possible that problems within the relationship led them to cheat in the first place. As they seek a way to keep everything in order, they may decide to suddenly become easy going about everything. They may become completely agreeable to everything and not question any decisions you make. This is also a dangerous sign because it means that they are disengaging from the relationship.

There are many reasons for a cheater to pick fights. Stress from juggling multiple relationships can lead to conflict in the home. Fights are often used to deflect attention from the deception at hand. They may also pick fights to justify storming out of the house and taking “hours” to cool off. If you notice that you are always having fights for the slightest of reasons and whenever there is a fight they are quick to storm out of the home late at night, they may be using this as an excuse to see their secret lover. Don’t be deceived by this ploy.

If your significant other is cheating, they maybe avoiding all conflict with you. They may suddenly become agreeable to many things that they previously didn’t agree to. This is to try and create an overly positive spin on the home life of the relationship to mask their activities with a secret lover. Beware if you have had doubts about someone cheating and then they suddenly have become completely agreeable to everything that you want.

Picking fights serves multiple purposes in a cheating situation. As a starter, it’s a way to try and get your partner to leave you. This absolves the cheater of guilt for ruining the relationship. Secondly, picking fights for random things will divert your attention from the real problem at hand – the fact that they are cheaters. Cheaters will want to pick fights to keep the attention on the relationship and also to help you feel that the problems are just between the two of you. If you notice small thing being blown out of proportion and being escalated into full fights for no reason, there may be something else going on.