Latest stuff in the ‘Changes in Finances’ Category

Hiding promotions and bonuses

Has your loved one stopped mentioning their bonuses? It’s possible that they are either stashing that money to use for themselves or worse, to spend on their secret lover.

W2 (tax return) discrepancies

Unfortunately the secrecy of adultery doesn’t always stop with lies about the relationship. Often a cheating partner will try to live a double life to hide suspicion. Many people don’t pay attention to joint tax forms. However, make sure that there is no discrepancy between the revenue listed on your annual tax returns and the lifestyle that you are used to living with your lover. Don’t ignore this, because if there is unaccounted-for income, someone else may be reaping the benefit of that revenue.

Spending on cheating purchases

There are products related to affairs. The most common ones are gas, eating out, hygiene, flowers, clothing, and hotels. If you think about dating, you have to spend money on gas or transportation. You will often see an increase in gas and transport expenses when an affair starts. Dining out is a big part of dating as well. When an affair starts (most likely with men) there will be increased spending on dining out. Does your man suddenly have an OpenTable.com account? Maybe something else is going on! Does your lover suddenly feel the need to spend money on taking care of themselves? This can be a sign that something else is going on as well. Look out for increased expenditure on deodorants, colognes, perfumes, scented soaps, manicure kits, pedicure kits, scented lotions, and makeup. Look out for retail purchases from department stores. Your cheating lover might be looking for new outfits to impress their new lovers with. Finally, keep an eye out for hotel expenses. Your lover might be smart enough not to charge a hotel room to their card, but someone has to provide cards for the hotel incidentals.

ATM withdrawals

Although people need to spend cash to fund affairs, many people find that hiding bank accounts is too cumbersome. The alternative is to simply not use your bank account for naughty purchases. This saves the cheater from having to worry about the wrong type of charge appearing. The result of this behavior is an increase in the number of ATM withdrawals. By using cash, it’s virtually impossible to track where the money is spent. If you see a huge spike in ATM withdrawals, there might be something else going on.

Missing bonuses

Does your significant other get a routine bonus? Have you noticed suspicious behavior, and that this year they’ve made no mention of it? In an attempt to fund an affair, your significant other may decide to try to use the sudden windfall of cash (the annual bonus) . Keep an eye out for bonuses, or increased income from promotions that simply don’t materialize. While on its own, it’s hardly proof of something bad going on, combined with different signs of infidelity it can be a good indicator.

Credit card statements

Credit card statements can be a great way to see what your significant other is really spending their money on. Even though the statements may not be completely itemized, you should be able to find themes of items. Take note of the following categories: entertainment, hotels, travel, gas, gifts, retail, and restaurants. If you notice some unnatural spikes in these types of purchases, and you have not been the recipient, something fishy might be going on.

New Cash Windfalls

Sometimes people finance their new relationships with lavish gifts. While a routine relationship will acknowledge that expenditure can’t be rampant, new relationships require upfront expenditure to get the ball rolling. If your significant other suddenly has a lot of new cash, they may have cashed out a retirement account / money market / savings account in order to find a new relationship. If you suspect your significant other, and they suddenly have tons of cash, you might want to do some investigation to get to the bottom of this.

Accountant not answering your calls?

This falls right in line with sudden inability to access your financial resources. Assuming that you have an accountant who handles your joint affairs – if you suddenly find that your significant other is acting suspiciously and also your family accountant won’t return your calls that might be a sign that there’s something significantly wrong going on. Make sure that they haven’t partnered up to cheat you out of the money that is rightfully yours.

Trips to the Cayman Islands

A lot of people don’t know that the Cayman Islands are a preferred destination for laundering money. People take money to the Cayman Islands to deposit into banks that won’t report their deposits to the United States. Is your lover constantly taking trips to the Cayman Islands for no apparent reason? You might want to look into your bank accounts and financial resources to ensure that they are not being diverted to another country.

Retirement accounts gone empty!

This is more of a sign of imminent separation than just infidelity. In preparation for running off with a new lover, some people will liquidate your assets. If you find that you have confirmed infidelity and your retirement accounts have been drained, you need to hire a lawyer and a private investigator immediately. Do this to protect yourself to ensure that you don’t lose access to the resources you’ve built up over years.

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